I don't know if you'll bother yourself to read this:

I read your blog. scrolled all the way to the last line on the page. which means, i read your latest entry till the older ones displayed on the same page.

To me, i feel that your life has improved so much as compared to when we were together. You're meeting people, and meeting new people. you're going to events, recording reputable artistes, feeling happy with your job. you're finally taking up active exercises like running, situps, push-ups etc, things that i told you to do in the past which you always replied with "doing housework is like exercising". Your life sounds great except that you're drinking so much.

i feel that you'll make it big soon. I won't go as much as to say drinking will ruin your health, i think your mum would talk to you about it. i believe you have enough sensibility to know that as well.

i understand that you care, you tried to talk to me on msn the day before my exam. i blocked you off because of your vulgarities. you must be very angry with me for blocking you off like this. i just don't understand why you like to speak vulgarities when you're angry with me knowing well that i hate vulgarities and refuse to talk to anyone speaking vulgarities.

i remembered years and years ago, you told me that before i start going-out with a guy, not only should i know the good-side of him, i should also find out how he is like at his worst.

Somehow, i feel that it's because the way you react when you angry that puts me off. anyone can be angry and say angry words. but no vulgarities. Seeing what you typed on msn makes me feel that i didn't know you enough before we dated each other. it makes me feel that we're really not suitable for each other.

Seeing that you're doing better with your job and life, except the drinking part, makes me feel that without our relationship, you're more proactive with your way of doing things. it's good. I'm happy for you.

I'm not trying to make any point here. if there is any effective communication, i guess it is only when we don't communicate directly with each other. Sounds kind of sad, but at least we won't feel agitated by each other's words and start becoming defensive and abusive in our conversation. i know you'll take care of yourself, but still, take care.