I just came from Wee's blog. Wee had been nightmarish while i've been deprived of sleep.

Don't worry. I am okay.

These few days I've been hearing unhappiness in the family. In the past, I was confident that my aunties and uncles are filial people, our family is cohesive and everything can be talked over openly and honestly. When i read about families falling out because of disagreements in distributing estates, i thought it would not happen in my family. But i guess, i appreciate the saying 画虎画皮难画骨 知人知面不知心 to a deeper extent now. 谈钱伤感情。 As a younger generation in the family, i have no right to interefere. i have no wish to interfere too. I just feel sad for my grandma for having these children. I feel sad that some uncles can threaten to do harm to their own children if they don't get the estate. Some uncles can hurt their own bodies to threaten one another into giving in. Even the aunties pretentiously tell my grandma how all the money given to them by my grandpa were used up before my grandpa passed away. 司马昭之心路人皆知。 They want bigger portions of the estate. They don't care if my grandma is heartbroken.

They don't care what kind of example they are setting to their children.

I feel very sad that my favourite uncle is one of the maddest in this episode. He is a different person now. It's scary to think that the man who brought me to swim every sunday when i was young, is now the man who wants nothing else but money. I used to think that i want to help him cope with his family expenses after i start work. I used to feel closer to him than my own father. Now, i am compelled to re-evaluate my relatives. I don't feel comfortable when i'm around them anymore.

In the face of this family crisis, i feel that everything else becomes negligible in comparison.

In any case, i am very happy that Jia and Ed are back. Even though we don't have much to talk to one another (esp when i forgot almost all A-level phy, math... and i have no knowledge of computing), i enjoy listening to your lives overseas. I wasn't bored. I think it's great that you guys enjoy your exposure overseas, i like to hear about them from you too. But i feel even happier that you still care for your friends back home. I always like people who care for old friends.

Wee, for one, is the most caring friend i have. I hardly ever talk to him unless we meet up during our outings. but each time, he cares to ask about how i am doing and i can feel that he ernestly wants to know how i'm getting on. he's kind of a man of few words but he is capable of uncovering my blind spots with his uncommon common sense.

I haven't been honest with my caring friends. Not sure if you read the comments. I want to tell my own friends what happened to me through me, not thru' the comments. If i don't wish to talk about things that happen to me yet, i don't like anyone to probe no matter how concern the person may be.

I guess i am deprived of this simple right of mine. [For my friends, please do not probe because i don't wish to discuss this yet. Give me time. In any case, i know help is just a phone call away. thank you. ]

I don't blame you for leaving comments. so do not be defensive.

I understand that the person who care most about me would want to point out my flaws to me. i understand where you come from. However, i do not approve of your approach. in any case this is a public blog, i do not feel the necessity to prevent your thoughts from reaching the public despite that it is not my intention.