Last friday i had a small gathering with my nj classmates. I feel that it was kind of terrible because i was the organiser and the latest-comer. Grace says i'm a chronic late comer. I think it's very hard to kick the habit. of course, that is not the only reason why the outing was terrible. I guess its quite the same problem as the outing on Wed with my hc gang. We don't exactly have a common ground. when we don't really have a common topic, it may come to a point of either enduring the pretence of conversation or awkward silences.

I hope people who attended the gathering (be it primary school, nj or hc)don't feel that way. Hope everyone was happy to have attended and time was not wasted.

I'm not too sure what the rest feels. A primary school friend once reflected that a gathering seems superficial since people are just networking with one another and no real care and concern takes place. do you think so?

For me, the thought of seeing one another is good enough. at least, i feel happy to know that everyone is still alive, that everyone seems to be living well, and bothers to turn up at the meeting for everyone else to see (and to see everyone else). I always have nothing much to share at such outings but i still like to attend because i haven't met these old friend in ages and i do want to know if they are doing fine.

I appreciate people who turn up for the outings and i hope my poor planning will not discourage them from attending future outings.

Sometimes i wonder, what will happen if a group of friends have a common ground throughout all phases of their lives? Like those good friends we see in taiwanese idol-drama (偶像剧) e.g. ah mon and his gang in the show "devil beside you". I used to hang out with 2 girlfriends in my secondary school days everyday after school and on saturdays for our CCA and even after CCA. Six days a week, we spend most of our free time together. We had several impromptu outings, and we were always able to have one anothers' company. When issues cropped up, we always took the same side together. That lasted for about two to three years until a petty quarrel broke us up. We were supposedly back in contact since last year, but things are not the same anymore. I still think fondly of those days when we believed we would be best friends in our lifetime. =O) but life isn't perfect afterall.

I guess, many people learnt the lesson that friends do drift apart. that's why everyone prefers to have a lot of friends, and make lots of different friends at different stages of their lives. I think that is great. But what i feel is greater is that the old friends who are willing to stick around after many years are truly friends who will last a lifetime. Even though 昙花一现 kind of friendship (like my 2 gf and i) makes beautiful memory, it is this kind of friendship that makes you very lonely once it is over. Conversely, while the 细水长流 kind of friendship (may be people who you are never really close to, yet they are always around) may not satisfy your hunger for a sense of belonging, it is this kind of friendship that repels the loneliness in life.

it's kind of a weird "theory".

I don't know what i am driving at. if you don't make any sense out of these,...erm, it's normal. =O)